What is Romance? 


Author: Samantha Lach, LCPC (she/her)

Date: August 23, 2021

After a year and a half of close living quarters and high stress levels amid the COVID pandemic, it can feel really challenging to conjure up feelings of love and romance for our partners. It may even feel like focusing on romance and pleasure can feel like a non-priority when you’re looking at a never ending to-do list. 

It may not surprise you to learn that romance, pleasure, and intimacy are all important parts of any romantic relationship. What you may not know is that it doesn’t need to be a big production with an expensive meal, special bottles of champagne, and fancy candles. Romance also does not have to result in physical intercourse.  Bricolage Wellness wants to challenge you to stretch your definition of romance this month. Aim to incorporate one or two romantic actions into your relationship each week. 

Here are a few ideas of simple acts of romance and intimacy: 

  • Make it a point to put your phones away for one meal and focus on your conversation 
  • Give your partner a 6 second kiss or hug 
  • Take a walk with your partner somewhere different like a park in a nearby neighborhood 
  • Hold hands with your partner when you’re out together
  • Have a conversation about what you have liked about your physical intimate relationship with your partner outside of the bedroom
  • Schedule a kid-free happy hour at home complete with both of your favorite beverages and snack foods
  • Have a quick & steamy make-out session with your partner
  • Spend some quiet time together- reading, cleaning, meditating, etc. 
  • Send a flirty text to your partner about something you like about them
  • Write your partner a note for their lunchbox and share something you’re grateful for about them
  • Spoon or cuddle for 5 minutes with your partner 
  • Take the 5 Love Languages Quiz Together
  • Give your partner a 2 minute back or foot rub  
  • Put on a song that is meaningful to both of you and dance together in the kitchen
  • Do something new together- cook a new meal, play a new game, listen to a sex & realtionshp podcast, workout, etc.
  • Download the free Gottman Card Deck and spend some quality time answering some of the Love Map questions together
  • Engage in some self love- what feels good for you and helps you feel loved by yourself?
  • Self-massage, meditation, dancing to your favorite songs, cooking your favorite meal, etc.

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